There's a Light that I can't Find

I had to go to the emergency center yesterday. I pulled my back out ~ They gave me a shot, and prescriptions for steroids and pain meds. Fun stuff. I am not even sure how I did it , I was just aware of the intense pain!

My ex-boyfriend called me yesterday out of the blue. I hadn't talked to him in months. He just wanted to catch up and invite me to lunch sometime. It was good to talk to him. I don't know about lunch, I know that would bother Zach if i did that. But who knows.

Had open house tonight at the school and got to see some of Austin's work ~ It was great! He is really doing well and everyone I talked to about him gave him glowing reports.

I have been suffering from my depression for a while now. I can't seem to snap out of it. Of course, all of this job disappointment doesn't help. I just don't know what is wrong, so I can's seem to snap out of it. I need to see a psychiatrist and so does Austin but there isn't one in town. We would have to drive over an hour to get to one and that just does not sound appealing to me :( So we are just making it hoping that one opens. I really hope someone comes here. We need it desperately.

We had a break in our money situation, found some extra money in our savings account, not much, but it's enough to make do until next week. Thank the Goddess!

Leaving you with this song by 3 Doors Down ~"When I'm Gone":

There's another world inside of me
That you may never see
There're secrets in this life
That I can't hide
Somewhere in this darkness
There's a light that I can't find
Maybe it's too far away...
Or maybe I'm just blind...
Or maybe I'm just blind...

So hold me when I'm here
Right me when I'm wrong
Hold me when I'm scared
And love me when I'm gone
Everything I amAnd everything in me
Wants to be the one
You wanted me to be
I'll never let you down
Even if I couldI'd give up everything
If only for your good
So hold me when I'm here
Right me when I'm wrong
You can hold me when I'm scared
You won't always be there
So love me when I'm gone...Love me when I'm gone...

When your execution X-Ray
Cannot see under my skin
I won't tell you a damn thing
That I could not tell my friends
Roaming through this darkness
I'm alive but I'm alone
Part of me is fighting this
But part of me is gone